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Rainy Days

Rainy days are perfect for getting homework done.

Or,

for eating lots of snacks and scrolling through pinterest and looking out the window and typing about one sentence of my paper every hour.

Either one.

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Thoughts

Lucky

I’ve never been told that I’m not good enough or that I won’t succeed. I’ve never felt that I was on my own or that I couldn’t do something that I set my mind to.

I read a facebook status today that mentioned all of these things. It mentioned that people try to pull you down in life and that you need to keep going. As I read it I thought, “who would tell people that they aren’t good enough or that they won’t succeed?” I couldn’t even imagine hearing those things or knowing someone who would say those kind of things. At first I thought that it can’t be that bad, and that maybe this person was feeling this way without reason. But you know what? I bet it can be that bad, I bet people do say those kinds of things, I bet people do feel this way at times.

And, as for me, I know that I’m so so lucky. To have never felt this way and to have a hard time imagining it? While it does leave me feeling sheltered and a little guilty, I know that I should rejoice in these feelings of support and acceptance. I’m so lucky and so so blessed.

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Winding Down

I can finally see the end of my to-do list! It’s so exciting!! I have a paper due this Friday, a unit plan due Monday, two presentations on Monday, another paper due Tuesday, and a response paper due Wednesday. And then I’m done!!!

I’ve been hearing lots of people in the same program that I’m in complain about the coursework this semester. Even though it has been a lot of work, I’ve honestly felt that this semester has been great. I’ve gotten experience teaching, I’ve stretched my thinking in terms of social studies and math, and I’ve done a lot of great writing. I’m not sure what I’m doing differently (or what I’m not doing that I should be doing), but I’m just not as stressed as everyone else! The same goes for student teaching next semester – most people are already expressing how nervous and stressed they are about how much work we have and about how the semester will go. I’m just sitting here excited about all the possibilities and the experiences that I will have! A friend was asking about some of the guidelines for the unit project we have to do next semester and wondering if an idea she had would fit into those guidelines. I told her that I wasn’t exactly sure, but that if she thought it would be good to do, then she should do it. All the assignments we’re given are meant to benefit us and cause growth in our teaching abilities. I think that professors, supervisors, and teachers are more than willing to accomodate you when you’re all working toward the same goal. If everyone would look at assignments as being beneficial for them, then I think they would get a lot more out of their work! Of course, I’ve done my fair share of assignments that I thought were ‘pointless,’ but I still think that going about assignments with a mindset of ‘how will this help me’ can make a world of difference.

Another reason I’m in such a good mood today is because of my progress with my graduate school application. Today was the first day that I actually sat down with the application and tried to get everything together for it, and now I’m done! If I knew it was that easy I would have done it a few months ago. I really do think I was putting it off because I hadn’t fully decided if I wanted to go forward with it. I’ve made my decision now though and I’m excited to see what this next year of schooling brings. I talked to an advisor today about some independent studies and other 500 level classes I’ll be taking and it made me even more excited.

I can’t think too far ahead though, I still have student teaching and then Australia to experience before I even move on to graduate school. It feels great to have made these decisions and to plan ahead for the next year or so. On a smaller scale though, I can’t wait to see what these next few months bring!

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Underneath

We dress our bodies up in fancy clothes, covering them in certain ways to impress others. Walking into a room, your dress and boots combo might stand out while others look on. And then..your stomach makes a weird noise. And we all just look around and pretend it didn’t happen. Pretend that we aren’t just people living our lives making things up as we go.
As I sat in a meeting today and a moment of silence fell upon the room, I thought about stomach sounds and how we’re all just the same underneath it all.